


Windless Nights

by midas_touch_of_angst



Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events - One Shots [10]
Category: A Series of Unfortunate Events (TV), A Series of Unfortunate Events - Lemony Snicket
Genre: Childhood Trauma, F/M, Family, Family Feels, Gen, Minor Character Death, Parenthood, Pre-Canon, Speculation, Trauma, VFD is Terrible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:41:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21811594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midas_touch_of_angst/pseuds/midas_touch_of_angst
Summary: "Let's calm down," Violet said. "Remember the time we watched a scary movie when our parents were out for the evening, and we were jumpy for the rest of the night? Every time we heard a noise we thought vampires were breaking into the house to take us away.""Maybe somebody was breaking into the house to take us away," Klaus said, and pointed to the photograph. "Sometimes things can go on right in front of your nose, but you don't know about them."- The Carnivorous Carnival, Chapter Six
Relationships: Beatrice Baudelaire & Klaus Baudelaire, Beatrice Baudelaire & Sunny Baudelaire, Beatrice Baudelaire & Violet Baudelaire, Beatrice Baudelaire/Bertrand Baudelaire, Bertrand Baudelaire & Klaus Baudelaire, Bertrand Baudelaire & Sunny Baudelaire, Bertrand Baudelaire & Violet Baudelaire
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events - One Shots [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1542739
Comments: 6
Kudos: 40





	Windless Nights

Violet, Klaus and Sunny had made the mistake of watching a horror movie while their parents were out, and Beatrice and Bertrand had returned from their evening outing to the orchestra to find their oldest two huddling under blankets on the couch, with Sunny pacing the floor and growling, prepared to defend from any attack. Beatrice had glanced from her children to the tape lying beside the television, and she’d simply laughed and moved over, picking up Sunny- barely a few months old and much too small for her age, and thus small enough that Beatrice lifted the struggling infant with no issue- and cuddling her to her chest, while Bertrand moved to the couch. He ended up scooping up Klaus, who was starting to get too old to be held, and putting his arm around Violet. 

“It’s dumb.” Violet huffed, glancing away from her parents as if ashamed of her reaction. “It’s just a dumb movie.” 

“Alucard,” Sunny said, which meant something like, _“But the vampires are going to break in and kill us.”_

Bertrand flinched a little, and said, “Nobody’s going to break in and kill you.” 

“How do you know?” Klaus asked. 

Bertrand paused, and then said, “We have window locks.” Violet laughed at that, and he said, “Besides, your mother and I would never let anything happen to you.” 

“Unless they kill you first.” Klaus said, eyes wide. 

“Not gonna happen.” Beatrice said. “You may not believe this, Klaus, but we can hold our own in a fight.” 

Klaus glanced from his mother in her flowing evening gown to his father, awkwardly fiddling with his glasses, and then looked to Violet, clearly unconvinced. Violet, though, just said, “Come on, Klaus, we should’ve been in bed an hour ago. We’ll be awake all night if we don’t go now.” 

“We’ll be awake all night anyway.” Klaus shivered. 

“You’ll be fine.” Bertrand promised. 

“Listen, dears,” Beatrice sighed, “I’ve studied bats. I know all their tricks, okay?” 

Sunny bit her lip and _hmm_ ed, and Violet said, “When did you study bats?” 

Beatrice forced a smile. “Think I was a little younger than you. But that’s not important right now, is it? Off to bed.” 

Klaus and Violet ended up quietly racing each other up the stairs, and Bertrand and Beatrice fell behind, going into Sunny’s room and taking a while to lull the infant to sleep. Sunny was very shaken and kept clinging to her mother, muttering about monsters and something with sharper teeth than her, and Beatrice rocked her and told her that she still had the sharpest teeth and shouldn’t worry, while Bertrand quietly made sure the windows were locked tight, shutting the blinds. 

It was maybe an hour before Sunny drifted into sleep, and Beatrice quietly put her down in her crib, tucking her handmade blanket over her and smiling softly. Her husband shut off the lights, and then they headed to Violet’s room, seeing her curled in her bed and pretending to sleep. They kindly pretended to believe her, though Bertrand did walk in and flick on the nightlight on her dresser, one their daughter had built for herself and Klaus when she was eight, and Beatrice left her door slightly ajar so that she could leave quickly if she wished. They hoped she was too busy pretending to snooze to notice them swiftly shutting her curtains, just in case. They also pretended not to hear other, small noises- what sounded like a tap by the window, or a knock on the walls from outside. They didn’t hear that. It was just the wind.

They wandered into Klaus’s room, where he already had a book open and a small flashlight pointed out so he could read in the dim light. He looked up guiltily as they laughed and entered, and Bertrand sat on the edge of his bed and ruffled his hair while Beatrice moved to check the window locks. Klaus had the windows open, and Beatrice said, “Better shut these. Vampires can’t come in that way.” 

“Technically, they can’t come in without invitation, Bea.” Bertrand reminded her gently. 

Klaus shook a little. “Not in the movie.” 

“Maybe we need to show you a worse vampire movie.” Bertrand suggested. “Just so you know they’re nothing to fear.” 

“Think I still have _Vampires in the Retirement Community_ somewhere in the attic.” Beatrice considered, glancing back as she grabbed the window handles. 

“That could work. Ever figure out how to turn off the subtitles?” 

“That’s half the fun, dear-” 

Their light conversation was cut off by some sort of hissing sound. Beatrice instantly froze, her eyes growing wide, thankfully turned away from her son so he couldn’t notice. Bertrand managed to control himself a bit more, but as soon as Klaus turned to look at the window, he nearly crumpled, grabbing the edge of his shirt and struggling to control his breathing. They’d used the same noise on him. He just had to focus, stay in the present, stay here _with Klaus…_

“What was that?” Klaus asked. 

Beatrice shook a little, opening her mouth. She’d begun to form the words, out of instinct- it had been drilled into them what to say. And then she stopped, shutting her eyes, trying to think of what to say that wouldn’t signal anything outside, or that wouldn’t frighten her son. 

Finally, Bertrand managed to breathe more easy, and he said, “It was the wind.” 

Klaus turned to him in confusion. “There is no wind.” 

Crud. “Maybe a slight breeze. Or someone’s machine. Does Violet have any inventions outside that could make that noise?” 

“I guess.” Klaus shrugged. “She hasn’t left inventions outside for a while, though, because of that time it rained on the toasterclock.” 

“Well,” Beatrice finally grabbed the windows, shutting them tight and almost slamming onto the lock, before pulling shut the curtains, “What do you say your father and I go check it out?” 

Klaus paled and shook his head, terror gripping him. “No! The monsters’ll get you!” 

Beatrice moved to sit on the edge of her son’s bed, and held out her arms. “Okay, cuddle close.” Klaus almost raced over to her, throwing himself at her in a hug. She laughed, pulling him closer. “Scooch in.” She hadn’t done this for a few years- Klaus had seemed to have grown out of it, but now he was clinging to her, grateful she was _here._

She began to sing a little, and as she did, she glanced over at her husband, holding out an arm. He joined them in a huddle, but while Klaus shook slightly, his parents shared looks. Fear, trepidation, anticipation, and finally, determination. 

After a minute or two, Beatrice said, “What if we leave the lights on, and the door open, and we’ll leave our door open, and you can come get us if something is wrong?” 

Klaus glanced down. “I think I’ll be okay.” 

“Why don’t we do it anyway? Just to be safe.” she leaned in a little closer to him, and then said, “You know what? Vampires can’t go into rooms that are lit.” 

“You’re making that up.” he giggled slightly. 

“Hey, who’s the bat expert here?” 

“Me! I read all the library books about bats.” 

“No, you haven’t.” 

“Well, the ones I could reach.” 

Beatrice laughed a little, before pointing to the book he’d been reading earlier. “And is _that_ a book on bats?” 

Klaus shook his head. “It’s a book about a group of people who band together to kill a vampire. I thought it would make me feel better, but I don’t think it is.” 

“Well, then, I have an idea.” Bertrand said. “What if I go get one of _my_ favorite books, one that makes me feel better?” 

“I’m not gonna read Saxe again, Father.” 

“No, not Saxe.” Bertrand laughed a little, pulling a mock offended face. “It’s a romance story, about a woman who has to learn about jumping to conclusions and what the difference is between being good and seeming good. Does that sound alright?” 

Klaus nodded fervently, and Beatrice slowly slipped away from him. “Alright. We’ll be right back with the book. Why don’t you try to sleep, or read something else until we find it?” 

“Okay.” he shook a little, and Bertrand gave him a soft kiss on the forehead, before his parents stepped outside.

They left his door open to keep him calm, so they had to stay silent until they were a few hallways away. Then Beatrice said, “They can’t get in.” 

“We have locks.” 

“The windows are closed.” 

“And we’re getting out.” 

“Just a few more months.” 

“Let’s just get Klaus that book and then…” Bertrand sighed. “I feel like we’re not sleeping tonight.” 

“We can take shifts. I’ll go through the halls while you sleep, we can trade off halfway through the night.” 

“I’ll patrol, you should rest.” 

“Bertrand, I’m fine.” 

“You just gave birth.” 

“It’s been a few months, darling. Klaus was worse than this as a baby.” she laughed a little, as they started descending the stairs to the library. “Remember when he would cry whenever he couldn’t see you?” 

“It wasn’t me, he just cried a lot.” 

“No, it was you.” Beatrice grabbed his hand, squeezing it tight, as they reached the first floor. “Klaus loves his father. They all do.” 

Bertrand shot her a grateful look, one that fell into a fearful one. “We really… should we check outside?” 

“I don’t know if we should leave the house.” she admitted, as they headed for the library; she started counting the doors, trying to remember where it was. “Just in case. Perhaps we could check the driveway. We-”

They heard, then, a small slam from inside the library. The slam of a window. 

Beatrice, at that moment, felt like she was somewhere else. Probably one of the most frightening moments of her childhood- she’d had quite a few more frightening moments since then, but for some reason this was catapulting to the front of her mind- was after she had been hiking with Lemony, Jacques, R and Jerome. The firestarters- then a much smaller group, more content on causing small disruptions than actively fighting them- had sent eagles, believing Beatrice held important information. She still had scars on her shoulder from when she was struggling too hard in the eagle’s claws, and the talons dug into her. It had been much more painful than expected, and she couldn’t stop screaming. It didn’t help that when the Firestarters came to fetch her from the nest, they had paid no attention to the blood on her sleeves or the tears in her eyes, and in fact pressed on her wounds when she refused to help them. If Jacques hadn’t called their chaperones, and if her chaperone hadn’t arrived when she did… 

She remembered little, to be honest. Her chaperone carrying her. Her chaperone dropping her, something had gone wrong. Lemony and R had taken her, then, to the nearest hospital with Volunteer doctors. They’d said something about infection, and something about blood loss, but her heart hadn’t stopped pounding the whole while, as if she was still in the air. When she’d finally come to, she’d been told that her chaperone had not made it out. 

And that- not the eagle, not the blood, or the interrogation or escape or hospital- was what had scared her the most. 

She barely remembered what she had said. She’d screamed something. Something at Jerome. Something at the doctors. Lemony was the only one who hadn’t gotten mad or upset, and he was the only one who didn’t leave. He was injured, too, but he dragged himself in and forced a hug on her as she screamed that her chaperone was _fine,_ they had to go back for her, they _had to go back for Ms Violet,_ she was okay… 

It was that same terror she felt when they heard the window slam open, or slam shut- whichever, it meant someone was in her home. Someone had threatened her safety and peace and _family._ Her family was in danger, and she could only feel a cold terror. 

Bertrand recovered first this time, and he raced ahead of her, unthinking, only throwing open the library door and stumbling inside, eyes wide. Beatrice hurriedly rushed after him, her mind buzzing. 

Inside, she could see three people. Vague faces swam in her memory- a face beside her in a meeting when Anwhistle Aquatics burnt, an old hazy face from across a classroom, or in a theater, and someone she had passed in the headquarters halls a few times, enough that they nodded at each other and sometimes waved. She didn’t know if Bertrand recognized them, but he spoke first. 

“Get out of our house.” 

One of the people jumped, while another said, “Stay calm, Baudelaire. This is a standard recruitment.” 

Beatrice stepped forwards, grabbing onto her husband’s arm. “No, it’s not. We didn’t give permission for recruitment. They’re not going.” 

One of the agents said, “Don’t delay us, Baudelaires. They’ve been outside of training far too long anyway- your oldest should be an apprentice by now.” 

“No.” 

“Technically,” the third said, “We were supposed to recruit them before her bat mitzvah, but-” 

Beatrice stiffened and shut her eyes. She knew that, she’d seen people watching her daughter as they shopped for decorations and ribbons. They _both_ knew that, her and Bertrand, while Violet and Klaus had remained oblivious. And they both knew why the Department had stalled. 

“But you were waiting, because you found out there was another child coming that you could kidnap.” Bertrand said. 

He was trying to sound brave, but guilt crept into his voice. 

“This isn’t kidnapping, this is how all our neophytes enter the organization.” the first recruiter said again, stepping forwards. “You know this.” 

“Sunny’s just a _baby.”_ Beatrice pleaded, looking between each person in turn. “She’s only a few months old.” 

“She’s old enough to survive without parents.” the recruiter said simply. “She’s older than Snicket was when-” 

“Don’t you _dare.”_ Beatrice snarled, eyes spitting fire. “Don’t you dare bring him into this.” 

“She needs to start her training. They _all_ do. We’ve allowed you to play at normalcy for too long, but they have a greater destiny than this, a mission to serve.” 

“They are _children.”_ Bertrand begged. _“We_ were children.”

“Children who need to be brought up to keep the world quiet.” The recruiter sighed, and said, “We don’t have time for this. We’ll be in and out in a few minutes. The higher-ups will contact you for your next mission.” 

“We cut off _contact_ with all of you.” Bertrand reminded. 

“I’m sure that won’t be the case for long.” 

The three Volunteers moved past them, then, heading for the door. The words sunk into the Baudelaires’ head, and then they acted on instinct. 

Beatrice reached and grabbed the arm of the person nearest her, yanking back, while Bertrand leapt forwards. They knew they only had the element of surprise; Volunteers were all trained in combat, so they’d need to think of something to put them ahead of the three intruders. Beatrice managed to throw the one she’d grabbed over her shoulder, slamming into the wall, and she knelt down to trip the two who’d turned on Bertrand. As Beatrice threw herself at the Volunteers, trying to wrangle them away from the door, he raced to his desk in the corner, and he threw open a drawer. 

Just as he pulled the item from the desk, the third recruiter ran for Beatrice, who was being held back, an arm around her neck. She reached into the dress pocket she’d made herself, one that she’d added for emergencies. 

And within a few seconds, it was over. 

Beatrice whipped out her knife and stabbed the person ahead of her, and Bertrand held out the dart gun, and shot twice, first at the one charging his wife, then at the one holding her back. When the arm slipped from around Beatrice, she raced forwards and slashed again. 

It took several moments, then for the two parents to process what had just happened. The bodies had already hit the floor, and Beatrice had let the knife clatter onto the ground, and they were just staring at each other, breathing and shaking. 

And then Bertrand dropped the dart gun, stepped back, and screamed. 

He collapsed onto the ground, throwing his hands over his ears. It all hit him- the feel of the trigger under his finger, the woosh of something flying through the air, the bodies crashing… 

He’d just been fifteen, and after the opera, he’d run to Beatrice’s apartment, where she was staying with her second chaperone. The chaperone had been busy, so he’d climbed in through her window. She’d looked up from where she was huddled on a chair, shocked, and he’d collapsed then, too. And though back then they’d kept telling themselves over and over they were right, and it was part of the big plan, and everything was okay, she didn’t say anything then. She’d run over, and she’d held him. 

She was holding him now, even though she’d been splattered a little with blood. She held him and pressed her head against his, and they stayed there for a little while, just trying to remain calm. 

When he stopped crying, she shivered and said, “I think I can hide the bodies in the basement.” 

“I’ll find their car.” he muttered, his voice hoarse. “I can hijack it and find somewhere to stash it. Do you think they’ll…” 

Beatrice shut her eyes. “We’ll need to work fast. A few more months might not be enough. We need to get our kids…” 

She started crying, then, realizing that her children were still asleep upstairs. If they hadn’t headed to the library, if they’d stayed out later at the orchestra, if they’d gone to bed… their children would be gone by now. They’d be _gone._

“We’re not letting anyone take them away.” Bertrand said, and he put a hand on her shoulder, turning to look at her with tears in his eyes. “Never.” 

Beatrice shut her eyes and nodded, and then pulled away from him. “Whatever it takes.” 

It took several hours before Bertrand finally brought the book up to Klaus, and found him passed out on the bed, flashlight in hand, the vampire book still open underneath his head. He tucked him in, put his flashlight and book- bookmarked to where he’d left off- on his dresser, and checked the windows again. Beatrice found that Violet had fallen into a restless sleep, and she gave her daughter a kiss on the cheek and made sure the curtains were drawn as shut as possible. They checked on Sunny- still so tiny, still so small and young and innocent, and Beatrice sat on the rocking chair, and Bertrand on the rug, and they watched her for the rest of the night, only occasionally getting up, and only to check on her siblings and ensure they were still asleep. 

The next morning, when Violet awoke first, Beatrice and Bertrand went to their room and waited a while, before meeting their children downstairs for breakfast. 

“See?” Beatrice had said, smiling and rubbing Sunny’s little amount of hair, “No vampires. Mother and Father killed them all.” 

_“Mom.”_ Violet groaned, embarrassed enough, and Klaus nervously laughed as Sunny giggled. 

Beatrice and Bertrand only shared a look, and then spoke no more about it.

**Author's Note:**

> _"Let's calm down," Violet said. "Remember the time we watched a scary movie when our parents were out for the evening, and we were jumpy for the rest of the night? Every time we heard a noise we thought vampires were breaking into the house to take us away."_
> 
> _"Maybe somebody was breaking into the house to take us away," Klaus said, and pointed to the photograph. "Sometimes things can go on right in front of your nose, but you don't know about them."_
> 
> \- The Carnivorous Carnival, Chapter Six
> 
> _The shine of the flashlight reminded Klaus of all of the nights he spent reading under the covers in the Baudelaire mansion, while outside the night made mysterious noises his parents always insisted were nothing more than the wind, even on windless evenings._
> 
> \- The End, Chapter Eight 
> 
>   
> _On the day you officially join the organization, you will hear a noise outside your home. It may sound like the howl of a wolf, the cawing of a crow, the hissing of a snake, the chirping of a cricket, the engine of an automobile, the keys of a typewriter, the striking of a match, or the turning of a page. The noise will come in the middle of the night, the middle of the morning, or, in very rare cases, late in the afternoon. Ask your parents what the noise was. If they reply "nothing," they are replying in code, because there is never "nothing" outside one's home. If you are interested in volunteering, answer your parents with the following question: "If there's nothing out there, what was that noise?" We will be listening, and will know it is safe to act._
> 
> \- Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography, Chapter Twelve
> 
>   
> _And then they took him, yea they took him,  
>  They took him far away,  
> They took him in the dead of night,  
> Beneath a moon of gray._
> 
> _They took him from the kitchen,  
>  Like you'd take a midnight snack.  
> The V.F.D. they took him,  
> And they never brought him back._
> 
> \- Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography, Chapter One


End file.
